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What Matters To You?

what matters to you is more important than what matters to anyone else
❝Happiness is achieved through living a meaningful life.❞ -Joshua Fields Millburn

It's 2017, and Frank is moving into his new office. It feels good because he just accepted a director role with a firm that comes with a high salary, opportunities to expand his network, and the potential for an ownership stake in this firm.

This new job should make him happy. On paper, it has everything. Frank's life right now is close to the exact opposite of life growing up. With this new role, he doesn't have to worry about money, he'll never be behind on bills, and he can afford essentially anything that he wants. But he's miserable.

Despite accomplishing everything that he thought mattered, he's pretty far from happy. The owner of the new company is a micromanager, and being micromanaged is the opposite of autonomy - his top personal value. After accepting the job, he found out that there is an expectation of working weekends and well into the evenings. He also gets very few vacation days, so the job doesn't satisfy another of his top values, adventure. Since everybody is expected to work so much, there is little time for reading and learning, making it very difficult to fulfill his values of curiosity and learning. It turns out this new job satisfies none of his values.

He ended up living a life where most of his time was not aligned with what was important to him. He never spent any time to figure out what mattered to him and thus was drawn to what he thought he was supposed to do.

Different Things Matter To Different People

It sounds obvious. Different people value different things. Different things matter to different people. Everyone has a different purpose. However, we don't act like it's obvious.

It's easy to get caught up in what we think we're supposed to be doing, or what we think we're supposed to find important. This is especially true if we haven't done the work to figure out what's important to us and the kind of person we want to be. Without considering what we want out of life, we're likely to live a reactionary life rather than an intentional life. It's easier to float around from circumstance to circumstance, letting life happen to us.

the things that matter can be different between people